I took a step back at took a look at myself. There are things I am happy with and there are certainly things I wished would be different. He has imposed quite sure a number of restrictions in my life and affected most of my decisions in the past and whatever that came out of it. Those are the parts I wished could be different. But that's over now right and I hope that my life to come would be different. In a way, it has.. but I think the main part of it, the core, is still affected but the years of those restraints and non-receiving of recognition, and the this cannot do and that cannot do without any reasoning. So much so that, I know many people believes that I am better than what I can do or what I am but there is still this part of me that is holding me down. Realising is probably a big part but after years it has been ingrained in me, it will probably also take years to get it out of me. I don't think anyone would understand or even get it and I think that there might be some people who think that it is not a big issue, it is just me. Yah, that's the me that is affecting everthing I do, or want to do. That's the me that needs you to understand. That's the me that still sucks.
My New Site
Will be transferring my blogs to this site.
In the midst of transferring and upgrading.
Friday, July 10, 2009
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3 comments:
hey babe...
i think i understand what you're facing. the other half also having those things around him...
well we cant change the past, but we can do something about the future. u can start with baby...
never put baby through those restraints or condone him/her..
jgn depress sgt eh.. it wil affect baby...
Love u loads..
xxMUmmyMoksxx
Like dance steps, taking steps back would mean steps forward would come. :)
Underneath all, there is Love. Believe that.
And the you that you...is the you that we all love unconditionally.*hugs*
hhmm ain when i read your entry... i could see me in there too. the degree could be different but a similar story nevertheless
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