Changes..

I have started going back to office, and I now leave my princess at my aunt's place. Not easy for me lah, at first, especially few days before the actual day. I was sooo down and all. So how has it been for me? Have to wake up earlier coz need to allocate like half and hour more to bathe her and to express milk. Fortunately, she is rather easy in the morning. I will just turn her and call her name a few times, then she will sloooowly try to open her eyes, sometimes, she will "want to cry" then I sing her morning songs and she will look at me with that blur2 look and either give me a tiny smile or a "what-you-doing" look. But she doesn't cry when I proceed to bathe her and dress her, my good little girl :) She has been good. Depending on the time, I would feed her. Well, before I started going to office, I have tried giving her formula milk but she downright refused, at most she will just play2 with the teat. They said to let her reach hunger, until no choice then will drink, but she would cry sooo pitifully, that I couldn't bear to do so. And we started on Similac but I personally do not like its smell (and it would even leave the funny smell lingering in the bottle), so we bought Friso. Smells nice. Didn't work either, so no choice have to tah-pau expressed breastmilk, and since my stash not exactly that huge, I also express twice a day, once in the morning and once at night. Tiring can? Apparently the first day, she didn't really drink much, not even finishing the 3-4oz per feed. This girl very funny, if I give her bottle, she would only finish at most 4oz (rare), even for her size. I have read that some babies can finish alot more. Anyway, even the next day she didn't drink much. So that snowballed and at night, she woke up more to feed. I also told my aunt to slowly let her try formula milk. So on the fourth day there, she finished 2oz (compared to all the other times when she will just push the teat out, and cry) so success. Now just to let her drink one feeding of formula per day and monitor lah, and then next week shall increase to twice a day, and finally, possibly I wouldn't need to express anymore. When my aunt SMS-ed that she finished the whole 2oz she made, I am happy, for obvious reasons, but at the same time, I felt sad... Perhaps the fact that she will not "need" me anymore saddens me. It used to be she cannot do without me. Anyway, I am still going to breastfeed her at night if my supply allows. She does look like she has slightly lost weight, no more comfort feeding bah.

Her schedule also all change. Now she sleeps at 8.30pm, all the way till morning, waking up only for feeds. So meaning, by the time I fetch her and all, I am only left with 1.5-2hrs with her :(  Cannot tahan, reach home, I will kiss2 her, hug2 her... Sooo miss her smell.